When you join the all encompassing club that is motherhood, I strongly believe judgement has to be left at the door. No mums should need to justify their decisions, whether it be breastfeeding or co-sleeping, clothing choices or meals.
Nothing annoys me more than competitive parenting or criticism of each other’s choices. We must fight tooth and nail to support each other, not rip our fellow parents to shreds. Parenting is unique to each particular family and our values surely reflect this.
I’ve definitely made a fair few mistakes over the years and have heavily beat myself up over them. Let’s face it, who hasn’t? Sharing these with like-minded mamas is the best tonic in the world, allowing me the relief that I’m not the only one facing this mammoth journey.
Guilt is part and parcel of motherhood, and as a result it has to be told where to get off, because we are doing the very best we can. If anyone isn’t making you feel the fantastic mother that you are, then they can jog the heck on.
All of the above are part of the mama code, rules to both live by and grab some reassurance from. That in mind, here are a few favourite mama code pointers I’ve learnt over my almost-7 years of motherhood (I’m sure I’ll gain a ton more along the way):
- Talk about the tough stuff as well as the good, it will honestly make you feel better.
- Sack off any competitiveness. Each child (and sibling in fact) is different, so cannot be compared.
- If you can’t face something another parent is fine with, trust your gut.
- You know your child better than anyone else and should never doubt this.
- Have the courage of your convictions and stick to your guns, even if those around you feel differently.
- Always remember how awesome you are.