Self-Preservation & The Art of Illusion


How many times have you said recently that you’re fine, when in reality this couldn’t be further from the truth? Do you think it protects you from vulnerability and helps manage difficult situations or the complete opposite?

I’ve been asking myself lately if I’m too honest, sharing a little bit much information when I could probably hold back. Although I’m quite private about most aspects of my life, this constantly conflicts with my heart-on-sleeve personality. Yet I do believe in the power of positivity, and powering through.

Self-preservation is hugely important- we have to protect ourselves and in some cases, that can mean glossing over the truth. Even burying it deep inside. I call it the art of illusion; when you slap a smile and lipstick on and look like all is hunky dory, but in actual fact, your day/week/year is utterly terrible.

It’s also a good coping mechanism as if you outwardly seem tremendous, you can almost forget whatever struggle is happening underneath. Whether that is just for a few minutes or longer. Maybe, it can let you forget what the problem was in the first place.

I think I’m prone to a little oversharing, as struggling with health obstacles I sometimes feel I need to justify emotional and physical absences. The same could be said if you were going through family problems, financial issues and just general tough times. Which is ridiculous, because with all parts of life people only need to know as much as you want them to. Surely that is the crux of self-preservation. We need to get the right balance, between seeking support and being over-exposed.

In reality, who actually cares if some people don’t get ‘it’, whatever the speed bump in your life may be? If I’ve learnt anything by now, it’s definitely that. So let’s keep protecting ourselves, sharing the rough and smooth with fabulous friends and learning new ways to empower each other along the way.


  1. Honest Mum May 25, 2016 / 6:43 pm

    Love this hun, I’ve found sharing with those I trust like yourself is hugely beneficial and also sharing what I selectively choose to on the blog helps too. I think as women we often feel we can’t reach out, that we have to appear to be coping all of the time and it’s just not true nor is it useful for us to feel and behave in that way, big love x

    • mummymode May 25, 2016 / 7:01 pm

      Gosh the coping bit is so true isn’t it! You’re right- I do think it’s all about balance. Thank you for reading, lots of love xx

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