Pressing Pause

Since becoming a brand new puppy mama, there’s been no shortages of cuddles and an extra excuse for down time. Something I think we can often overlook during busy lives, I’ve recently felt a bit burnt out and in need of pressing pause. After a gorgeous trip to London last week seeing my friend Adriana, founder of Ancienne Ambiance (more about that soon), the kids then broke up for school on Thursday.

With that came an onslaught of rain, causing serious cabin fever all round. Running alongside all of this, I’ve spent the last month or so gradually dosing down on painkillers which I had been taking for endometriosis. A process which needs to be slow and staggered, side effects are flu-like aches, shakes and panics to boot. Thinking I was doing OK initially, the panics sent me over the edge and in serious need of pressing pause.

It’s not always easy to admit any struggles, and as a mum I don’t have the option to stop. Step forward, my fab mum-in-law, who has had the kids to stay for the last couple of nights as an Easter holiday treat. I went to bed at 6pm last night, slathered from head to toe in essential oils, armed with my book and ready for calm.

It may seem excessively early a bedtime, yet I so needed this. I don’t think I realised how worn out I was actually. Today I’m closing my eyes to anything nagging at me that can wait, and quietly breathing in. I’ve gone from 300mg of Pregabalin/ Lyrica to 25mg in about 5 weeks, and am proud to have come so far.

Having done withdrawal before, I knew what was in store, yet it hasn’t made it any easier. Also, I think pressing pause is a lesson in self-care and the management of daily stress, which will always be a relevant coping tactic. Whether that is turning your phone off, deleting apps, saying no or going for a nap, whatever works could be healing in a way you didn’t know you needed.

Here’s to self-preservation, should you see an obvious reason for this or not. Kindness to mind, body and soul.

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